Upgrade At Your Own Risk

Girl Friend Upgrade

Dear Tech Support Team:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child-processes that took up a lot of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3, Football 5.0, BeerWithBuddies 7.5, and Outings 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0, but the ' uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0

Please help!

Thanks,

‘A Troubled User"

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that people complain about. Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program.

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!!

It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 5.0.

It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not to allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0 Manual under Warnings-Alimony- Child Support).

I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the environment.

I suggest installing the background application " Yes Dear* *" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep 3.0, Cook 1.5 and DoLaundry 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program NagNag 9.5.

Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flower 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0

STATUTORY WARNING: DO NOT, under any circumstances, install SecretaryWithShortSkirt 3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Regards,

Tech Support

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Boy Friend Upgrade

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0

I noticed a slowdown in the overall performance, particularly in the Flower 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0 applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as Cricket 4.1, NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

I've tried running NagNag 9.5. to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Thanks,

‘Desperate"

Reply:

Dear Desperate:

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM. At the command line, try entering C:\ITHOUGHTYOULOVEDME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.

 

If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Flower 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0. But, remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, HappyHour 7.0 or Beer 7.4

Beer 7.4 is a very bad program that will create snoringloudly.wav files. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or re-install another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 9.9.

Regards,

Tech Support 

Every (House 0.0) System can contain (Husband 1.0 and Wife 1.0) more than one operating systems. But at a time, anyone can work on only one operating system, that’s why everyone should know which operating system should be used at what time. This will keep the system cool and running all the time without crashing. Love inside pom pompompom (Intel inside)